We Must Be The Worst SEO Company On The Planet

No wonder other SEO companies laugh at us. We must be the worst SEO company on the planet. Here's why.

1. We don't have many clients

It's true. We don't have many clients.

Some SEO companies treat clients like Pokemon cards. Remember them? Gotta catch ‘em all! It’s certainly one way to fill the coffers, but we don’t do that.

At any one time, we have very few clients. Call us old-fashioned, but it’s the only way we have found to devote the quality time necessary to provide the clients we do have with what we call Proper SEO.

You won't believe by how much productivity rockets when you spend more time working on less websites like we do, but we think you'll like the results.

2. We don't do contracts

Are we mad? No contracts?! Everyone in the SEO game knows that the golden rule is to tie-in clients for as long as possible. Get them to sign on the dotted line for a year or two so that the money keeps rolling in regardless of results.

While you’re an SEO client of ours, we will work our cotton socks off for you in a bid to get you the results you want. You can bet your house on that. But if we fall short in any way, you’re welcome to leave at any time. No drama, no hissy fits, no penalties.

3. We don't guarantee to get you to the top of Google

Here's what works for most SEO companies. A promise to get you to the top of Google.

We don't even do that.

To be honest, we don't think there is a “top of Google”. It’s not like Mount Everest, with SEO sherpas guiding you to the summit. Google is more like the Himalayas, with mountain after mountain to climb. And at the top of every one of those mountains are customers looking to buy your goods and services.

That's why guarantees to get you to "the top of Google" are pretty meaningless. Often you'll end up ranking for your company name and little else, and that will be sold to you as the top of Google.

We want to plant your flag on top of every mountain where your customers hang out. So rather than promise to get you to the top of Google, we focus on getting your site featured prominently on search page results for multiple keywords and phrases that truly matter to your business. The more summits we reach, the more opportunity for you to make money. And there's nothing like it to get those tills ringing.

Incidentally, it could well be that there is an Everest to climb in terms of the competition you will face to rank for a particular keyword, but there will also be plenty of other mountains worth climbing to bring traffic to your website.

4. We don't promise instant results

Everyone and his dog wants their website to rank highly for countless keywords. And they want it to happen yesterday.

We can’t do that.

Search engine optimisation is a medium to long-term strategy to increase a website's visitor numbers, and if we know one thing about SEO, it’s that it takes time to reap the rewards for your efforts.

With a website that has not previously been optimised, you often see dramatic results fairly quickly, but it can often take three to six months before the full benefits of SEO become apparent.

5. We can't always outrank your competitors

Some will say we're too honest for our good because we will tell you what’s possible and what’s not.

And no matter how hard we try (and believe me, we try bloody hard), we can’t promise to always outrank all of your competitors for every keyword or phrase on your SEO wish-list.

That's because we have no control over Google's algorithms or indeed the changes that your competitors will be making to their own sites in a bid to outrank you.

But by playing to your strengths and exploiting their weaknesses, we will find ways to drive more traffic to your website and we will help you turn that traffic into more business.

6. We won’t work on your site every month

If you’re making SEO changes to a website every week or even every month, chances are you’ve absolutely no idea which changes are producing results and which ones aren't. We call this headless-chicken SEO.

Lots of SEO companies do this and it certainly makes them look busy.

We prefer to optimise websites in cycles: typically every three months.

This puts us in the crazy position of being able to do two things for you:

  • Devote big blocks of concentrated time to your SEO, rather than a few hours here and there

  • Take the time to determine what's actually working and what's not working for your website based on actual data

  • Don't think nothing happens during the months we are not "doing SEO". In months two and three of a cycle, we will analyse data we have on your website and your competitors' websites, and we'll be plotting and planning on your behalf, ready for the next big push.

    7. We don't game Google

    With so many websites vying for the attention of Google, it is all too easy to be tempted by companies selling the SEO equivalent of magic beans.

    These so-called "black hat" SEO companies resort to underhand techniques in a bid to trick their way to the top of the search engines. Buying links is a classic example, creating hundreds of near-duplicate doorway pages another. The problem is, sooner or later they get found out, and when they do, it isn't the company that suffers, it's your website. Any short term gain results in long-term pain.

    We work strictly to Google's guidelines when it comes to search engine optimisation. We believe it's the best way to do SEO and the only way to do Proper SEO.

    8. We don't think SEO stops at SEO

    Search engine optimisation isn't just about keywords and links. Or at least it shouldn't be.

    We see SEO as part of a much bigger picture.

    For example, how quickly your web pages load is down to the design of your website, but it also impacts your search rankings because Google rewards speed. We don't build slow websites, but if you've had your site built elsewhere and it fails the speed test, we'll get that fixed for you.

    Similarly, SEO can drive all the traffic in the world to your website, but if that traffic doesn't convert into customers, something is badly wrong. That's why we believe Proper SEO goes hand-in-hand with Conversion Rate Optimisation or CRO, and why we see CRO as an integral part of Proper SEO.

    9. We don't do cold calls

    Nope. You’ll never get a cold call from us. Or a spammy email. You know where we are if you need us.

    Still not convinced how bad we are?

    10. We’re not cheap

    There are companies out there who say they can do your SEO for £100 a month or less. I’ve no idea what they are paying their people, but it must be peanuts. Either that or those people aren't spending a great deal of time optimising your website.

    We don't have a one-size fits all approach to pricing. Instead, we look at factors such as type of business, competitiveness of the market place you operate in, and how your website is currently performing in Google. We will then make a no-obligation pitch for your custom based on what we would like to do, why we would like to do it, and what it will cost to implement.

    Our hourly rate for SEO work is £75.00 and our SEO packages start at £600 a month.

    Proper SEO takes time and it takes expertise. It involves employing people who are fluent in keyword research, competitor analysis, content optimisation, link building and more. It all comes down to rate of return and we think you'll find we offer exceptional value for money.

    Don't tell me you still want Brandwise to do your SEO?

    If you are still considering working with the worst SEO company in the world, here’s a few things we do bring to the table.

  • A burning desire to understand your business, its ambitions, and what you hope to achieve with SEO.

  • A plan of action based on a detailed analysis of not only your site, but audits of your main competitors' websites too.

  • A laser-like focus on delivering on your goals beyond more traffic, be they more sign-ups, more clients, or more sales.

  • An amazing knack of finding niche opportunities to drive targeted traffic to your website.

  • Anyway, enough about us. Maybe it's time to get together for a coffee (virtually or otherwise) and a no-obligation chat about Proper SEO and your business.

    We Must Be The Worst SEO Company On The Planet

    The Brandwise Difference



    We do quality not quantity. Which means we do our best work for you every single time.


    Over 20 years of experience of web design, content creation, domain names, SEO and SEM.
    Performance Driven

    Performance driven

    Everything we do is driven by a desire to make your till ring more often.


    We don't just share data with you. We are happy to share our knowledge too.
    Limited Clients

    Limited clients

    You become part of the Brandwise family. We treat your website like it is one of our own.
    Bye Contracts

    No contracts

    If you aren't happy with our work, you can walk away. No penalties. No tantrums.
    SEO Agency Brandwise
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